Lewis Black's got nothing on me these days

It should come as no surprise that no one in the Harpish household has been in an exceptionally good frame of mind lately. I was good for a few months, but lately, the triple whammy of a) caring for a wife with life-threatening cancer, b) working at a job that on a good day, sucks, and c) living in an area with no culture, no friends, no anything...well, that'd bring anybody down after a while. And this winter will never end! Even last week, it's still been trying to snow. No wonder I've been making Lewis Black sound like a veritable Pollyanna.

If the job sucks, why not quit? See C again. My job may be low-paying but I have health benefits, which I need as I slouch ever closer to decrepitude. Other jobs? Oh, that's a laugh. I used to think central Oregon was bad, but I couldn't even get a job as a pizza driver around here (and let's not forget this recession thing going on, which, if my economist friends are correct, is going to be a colossally larger bowl of ugly than most people anticipate).

I only have my current job because my previous boss didn't want to go through the rigmarole of going through the hiring process, and it was easier just to stick me in the position (which has created other problems, being as our HR department makes FEMA look like a paragon of efficiency).

Once it became apparent that I'd reached the limit of what self-medicating myself with various libations could do (when you're sucking down Triple Sec because it's the last thing left in the house - yeah, that's a bad sign), I decided that I'd better start seeing someone with experience dealing with borderline depressives like myself.

And it's helped. I'm in a somewhat better frame of mind, and the person I'm seeing is much more into the holistic side of things, not the pharmaceutical, which suits me fine (although I'd definitely go for some Ambien these days, as I don't think I've gotten a good night's sleep in about two months). We had our first official nice days over the weekend, when the thermometer actually topped 60 degrees for two days straight! That, too, may contribute to better moods all around.

We'll see if I need to hit the Xanax in the future but all in all we're doing a little better, about as well as one can do when stuck in this third circle of Dante's Inferno. We travel down to Portland next week to find out if the chemo is at least keeping the tumors from growing, or if it's on to Plan D, in which case I may need the Xanax...or more Triple Sec.

Dave

p.s.,
Cheryl here. Yes, it's depressing to be a cancer patient. Yes, it sucks to be somewhere you don't like. But I'm happy to say that we're both doing better using some independent counseling (see my previous post). Not only do we find out whether the treatment is working next week, we're also packaging the trip up with (a) a visit with a dear, dear, dear friend going through some medical issues of her own which luckily have turned out incredibly well due to a good surgeon and an iron constitution, and (b) we're gonna see the Mariners game on Thursday, May 8. Wheeee! Nothing like following up possible bad news with two great, um, other things. ;)